What do I stand for... [OWTS Application]

[Keigo Oen]

. . .Some nights, I stay up cashing in my bad luck. . .
. . .Some nights, I call it a draw. . .​

The rain seemed to continue coming down, for days now. Suyashi though didnt stop. No day or not would stop him in his pursuit to obtain the prowess his mother or father had. However, tonight seemed to be different. Suyashi was tired... school. Training. Home. Taking care of his mother. She seemed like she was getting worse in terms of her health. She was well, but she was getting older. Not able to do the things that she was able to do like the past. Like all the stories he'd heard from her and travelers that knew her and his father. Shaking his head, his hair was drenched, clothes were soaked as the thunder would rumble overhead. Suyashi continued to practice... throwing kunai into the boards near him. Talking in his head...

'Tch, I dont need him... I never needed him... He left us! He didnt love us!' and the rumbling would continue in the background. His rage would continue to build. Worse than the time he had fury gas on him in a class, worse than being alone to go through life like his parents were going to do. Like his father did... Did his father do this on purpose? Did he not love him? 'THUMP!' Another Kunai landing into the wood with ease, deeper than before. More precise. In his seemingly poised clutches were the Kunai that he launched from bloody hands... hours had gone by and he still threw the bladed weapons. Tightening his grip into the metal causing his fingernails to burst letting the blood flow into the grass below...

'. . .Some nights, I wish that my lips could build a castle. . .
. . .Some nights, I wish they'd just fall off. . .'​

Falling to his knees, the rain seemed like it was a battering ram of his own emotions pouring from the sky. He was the storm and the sky... he was the rain and the thunder. Most importantly, he was the lightning. The one thing he seemed to be good at and it left him even more detached from his father. All he wanted was a chance... one chance to hear his voice. To see him. Hold him. Tell him about his classes. Tell him about all the adventures he was having. When he fought a ninja cat gang! When he met Kouza for the first time. When he proclaimed in front of his peers that he would be the greatest shinobi to live. And many more things. Had his father been so selfish thinking about them! Thinking about the village that didnt even exist anymore! What was it even for! Why did he have to give himself to them, the name they no longer spoke! The name that was cast aside like a thorn in the foot of society!

</I>

'. . .But I still wake up, I still see your ghost. . .
. . .Oh Lord, I'm still not sure what I stand for. . .'​

<i></i>

Shaking his head as he looked up to the sky, he'd beg for a reprieve, calling out to the rain, "WHY! WHY DID IT HAVE TO BE ME! WHY DID YOU HAVE TO LEAVE ME BEFORE I MET YOU!", just then a flash of light would blind Suyashi, striking upon the surface of his forehead and knocking the boy back into an Oak tree and Suyashi's body would go limp before falling to the ground. His clothes ripped to shreds leaving him in a tattered heap of twitching flesh. Suyashi's body seemed to have a scar on his body in the shape of a spreading lightning strike... but inside the body of Suyashi going on was something... miraculous...

'. . .What do I stand for? What do I stand for?. . .
. . .Most nights, I don't know anymore . . .'​

<i></i>

"...Did I die?", looking around the young boy would seek something... anything but he seemed to be stuck in a black void. He could feel his body twitching. He could also feel... he wasnt alone wherever he was. Looking around at every corner there was nothing. Nothing anywhere around him. What was he supposed to be doing? What was all of this for? ". . .Hmph, You do look a bit like me. Dontcha. . .", a voice seemed to appear from everywhere and nowhere all at once. Looking around frantically Suyashi would look for someone, anyone that he could put the voice to. "The saddest moment a father can have is not even being there when their son is born... I dont even know your name... My son.", a deep bellowing chuckle would come from the voice as Suyashi would look around. It was nothing? Nothing was there! "...Wha-... Whose there!?" and all at once the black void would begin to feel warm. As the rays of the sun would hit his face, and he would blink a few times before seeing a face sitting next to him on the ground.

All around them, the training scene was still the same, the kunai deep into the bark of the tree target, looking down at his nails, as they seemed to scabbed over from the nights work. Though there was someone there sitting with Suyashi. A man, large and blond, wearing a blue version of the Hokage robes. It caused Suyashi to blink for a moment before the man would turn to Suyashi and give a smile, "Hello Son...", which caused Suyashi to take a moment to listen, who did this man think he was? spouting that 'Son' word like he was his mother. Only one person was allowed to call him such a thing. "I dont know you... Who do you think you are?", Suyashi would go to reach for his Kunai before the man would speak again, "Well you wouldnt know who I am... The last thing I remember was being on a hospital bed. But the big wigs say you're my son... And I can see it. Heh, You're definitely a Minamoto thats for sure. I can see your pride in your eyes...", nodding the man would smile again. Causing Suyashi to release the Kunai and think again,.

"....You... You are Minamoto Taro? My father?" He'd go toreach out for the man before a hand would stop him. "Son. I'm not here, You are Dreaming... you cannot hold me nor touch me. However, I want you to know. As long as you hold unto your dreams... I'll never leave your side. Never forget that. Whenever you want to talk to me... Just look up and speak. I'll be listening...", and as quickly as he was there Taro was gone. Blinking for a moment, Suyashi would find static coming from his hands and body, he could feel his body attuned to the lightning element. Maybe it was his training... Maybe the bolt unlocked it who knew. But Suyashi was sure this was real. It wasnt a dream.

It couldnt b-...​

<I>'Well, Some nights, I wish that this all would end
Cause I could use some friends for a change
And some nights, I'm scared you'll forget me again
Some nights, I always win
But I still wake up, I still see your ghost
Oh Lord, I'm still not sure what I stand for
What do I stand for? What do I stand for?
Most nights, I don't know...'​

Opening his eyes he could feel the wetness of the soil beneath him, and the rain as it slowed to a drizzle falling on him. It took every bit of strength in him to lift himself up from the ground, and the first thing he did was look behind him. The Tree that he collided with seemed to break and bust at the trunk as the bark seemed to be broken like it had been hit repeatedly by a sledgehammer. Looking to the sky he would shake his head, he felt stupid to think that he was talking to his father just moments before, though he thought to try something leaning back he would rest his back on the oak before looking up. "...Tch, I will surpass you old man.", and in the back of his head he could hear it... almost a whisper. "I know you will, my son...<i></i>, it almost caused Suyashi to flinch,
and as he did so lightning shot out from his finger tips into the ground. Caused him to raise his hand up... just like in the dream it was covered in static. What was real? He didnt know with this he would smile, "Heh, Dad... Watch me. I'm gonna be great.", nodding once again he'd finally muster the energy to lift himself up before making his way home in his tattered clothes.

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