A Silent Cry [Private]

[Ikeda Shiori]

Before now, Shiori had been doing his best to hold himself together. He'd attempted to look on the bright side of all this, make the best of a bad situation and all that. Shiori had even begun to convince himself that maybe it wasn't a bad situation after all. Things seemed kind of nice around here. Everything was so pretty, reminiscent of a story. Even being a shinobi sounded like something from a story of some kind. It hadn't been all that difficult to make himself believe that things could work out.

Sure, his father had sold him-

And that was as far as optimism got him. It was all nice to say that things were going to work out, but it wasn't enough. It couldn't change how he'd ended up here. Ignoring it had been a temporary measure. He'd just wanted things to be okay. He'd wanted to forgot the truth of the matters. It wasn't fair. It just wasn't..

He missed it. Shiori hadn't ever thought he'd miss it, but he did. He even almost missed his brothers! He wanted to go home.

It was that line of thinking that led to Shiori's current state.

He had gone to the library to study, or something like that. He didn't remember anymore. The what didn't really matter, not really. It was just yet another thing to distract himself from reality. Only, it hadn't worked out as planned.

Reading, as it turned out, reminded him of his mom. As it happened, one thought led to another, and then Shiori had found himself thinking of home. Then he'd found himself sobbing in the library.

There was a book still open in front of him, abandoned as he tried to pull himself together. He just couldn't do it! Any moment, someone could notice him, and what would he do then?!

He tried to muffle his crying into his sleeves, but it only did so much.

Shiori was just curled up in a chair in the library, crying. And now that he'd started, he just couldn't stop.

 

[Uchiha Keiko]

"Study or train? Study or train?"
He couldn't choose between studying and training. Satoru knew he had been training a lot lately and that if he didn't relax a little he would end up hurting himself but at the same time he wanted to get stronger no matter what, so that he could keep up with his brother. After a few minutes of thinking, he just decided to go study because he needed to stay on top of his studies. He knew what happened if you didn't and didn't feel like trying to catch up on them for a third time. His brother always got annoyed at him for skipping them.

"Guess I'm off to the library then... That's the most logical place to go study..." he said, in a slightly happier tone. The library was usually quiet, so it was his preferred place to study. No noise, no people bugging him to do more, just a book in hand and his mind taking in knowledge. Satoru felt slightly cold today so he made sure to bring hot food with him, wrapped up and put into his bag on his belt. It would keep the food warn for a little while but he didn't really plan on eating it warm, he just wanted the heat to stop him from being cold.

"Finally..." he said, walking into the library, making a minimal amount of sound.
He scanned around, looking for a place to go when something caught his eye. It was some kid... and they were... crying?
Unusual.
Satoru didn't really know how to react entirely in this situation because he came here to study but was instead greeted by a crying kid. Well, not directly greeted. It's a saying.

Satoru sighed. "There goes my time to study. Well, whatever."
He dragged himself over to the kid and as he got closer, he began to recognize the face. "Wait, that's the kid from!--" he stopped in his thoughts and reached the kid. A hand gently reached over to his shoulder, moving gently to ease him. "Are you alright? Why are you... crying? Especially in a library..." he whispered.

 

[Ikeda Shiori]

He was lost, in all of his memories. None of them had ever been particularly great, but they were still his. Memories were all he had now, really. The things he'd hated seemed like heaven compared to all of this. At least back then he'd know what he was. He was Ikeda Shiori, eighth son of Ikeda Hachirou and Ikeda Kasumi. His family had been farmers for generations. Even if he wasn't good at it, he would be one too. That was just how things worked.

Except that wasn't how things worked, not for him, not anymore. He was now an academy student. He was going to be a shinobi one day. Maybe a year. Maybe two. Maybe more than that, but it was inevitable. That was his life now. And he'd been trying and trying and he'd been doing all that he could! He really had! It wasn't his fault things weren't working out. Was it?

He was Ikeda Shiori, and he didn't have a clue what to do now. Another sob wracked his body. Everything was falling apart, and he wasn't sure he could put it back together again.

Shiori had ceased to pay attention to his surroundings, lost in misery. The hand reaching out to him was a surprise, almost as much as the words. His head jerked upwards, staring up at the newcomer with wide-eyes.

For a long moment he was just staring with a look between baffled and terrified. He couldn't speak, and even his sobs had fallen silent, scared away. He blinked watery eyes at this person, as he slowly recognized them.

Shiori bit his lip and resisted the urge to duck his head. He didn't want to look away, just in case. He wasn't sure what he was afraid of exactly, but it didn't matter. His heart was racing. He still couldn't speak.

He just didn't understand. He wanted to move away. This guy, he seemed like he was trying to comfort him, but Shiori didn't understand!

The panicked thoughts swirling around his head nearly sent him back into crying. Nearly. Shiori wanted to understand. Needed to.

His arms were wrapped around himself, and he wasn't entirely sure when that had started, but it was a small comfort.

Finally, he voiced a single, hushed word.

"...why...?"

Then his eyes widened further, and he tried to curl in on himself, hiding his head away in his arms. He hadn't wanted to look away before, but now he didn't want to watch. He hadn't really want to ask, not really, he'd meant to answer, except he couldn't do that, so he'd just, he'd just...

And then he was crying again.

 

[Uchiha Keiko]

It took this kid a while to reply. He was clearly upset, scared and just... not in a very good mood. And this bothered Satoru. He knew what it was like to be broken physically and mentally and to have no one there to help you, to protect you.

Satoru sighed a little more and then he heard the boy say something.
"...Why...?"
It came out of the boys mouth so quietly. So... gently. Yet, the words hit Satoru like a sledgehammer to the chest.
He remembered when his brother had been the first to care for him and all Satoru could do was say "...why...?" but his brother understood exactly why and didn't make it difficult for Satoru, so he would do the same for this little kid.

He didn't move his hand and he looked at the boy, who was now crying more and he smiled. Not that he kid could see it, but he would be able to hear it. "It's okay. I know how you feel. But, you shouldn't feel so down... I mean, I'm only assuming that you asked why because I'm showing you care and you don't usually get that... So, if so. I'm here for you. I know the pain of not being able to run to anyone. I know how it feels to be all alone... But you... You're not alone." he spoke quietly.

He wasn't usually so open with people but he hurt to see this kid sob away, alone, in a massive library like this.
His kindness would probably be his greatest downfall but he was working on it. He almost didn't want to get rid of it though. It was what made him, him. It made him unique and not like everyone else.

Especially after everything he had been through. Kindness was just one thing he felt was necessary.​

 

[Ikeda Shiori]

Shiori hadn't really expected this guy to sound so... so... kind. He lifted his head back up slowly, half-expecting this guy to suddenly call it all out as a joke. Again, it didn't make sense. This guy didn't even know him, not really. He didn't have a single reason to be acting nice like this. To Shiori, it all screamed of a trap.

People were only nice like this when they wanted something. Or when they had bad plans. Kaito had done that sometimes, when Shiori was being particularly skittish around all of the brothers. It had always ended badly for Shiori. But Shiori still fell for it, every single time without fail. And it wasn't really that he believed that it was true. He'd known that it really was a trap, after the first couple of times. He wasn't fooled. Shiori just kept going along with it, though, hoping that one day it'd be true. Sure, it hadn't been true the last time, but it was always possible that things had changed. Except they never did change. He'd end up having that tentative hope crushed. And it wasn't surprising, not really, but it always hurt.

The small child curled up in the chair blinked uncertainly, biting his own lip again.

Shiori knew that people could be genuinely kind. He really did. His mom had been the most compassionate person ever, and he never have anything to give to her. He'd tried to find things for her, but all he ever really had was his love for her. Except to her, that had been more than enough. Shiori sniffled. He really missed her. It'd been a year, but he didn't think that he'd ever stop missing her.

And now he was crying and shivering again. He didn't really trust this guy, not really, but he wanted to. He really, really wanted to.

More than all that, he wanted a hug.

Following that train of thought, Shiori practically threw himself at the guy.

 

[Uchiha Keiko]

The boy practically launched himself at Satoru.

In most circumstances, Satoru would be disgusted at this because he hated physical contact with others but because the boy was feeling down and not in the best of moods, he decided just to hug the kid. He needed it and badly.
He had seemed so sad and lonely that rejecting him would only seem horrible.

As expected though, Satoru could tell the boy didn't trust him very much. That was fair enough. He had just walked up to the kid, starting being all nice and helping him out of nowhere and was getting nothing in return. There was something almost shady about it. However, Satoru held no ill motives and was simply trying to help the kid the best he could.

"I'm not here to hurt you, you know? I know it might seem strange to have someone seem like they care when they've only met you. I'm doing it because I know how it feels to be lonely and sad. I went through the same thing as a child. I still am a child. So, trust me or not. I'm here for you. My entire family hates me besides one of them which is my brother. They hate me because I am different. So... I am somewhat of an outcast." he paused for a brief moment and looked up at the roof. "My brother helped me a lot. More than I can ever do for him because he's amazing... but... I can help you. I can help you with the loneliness and the sadness..." he whispered and then stood back up straight.

 

[Ikeda Shiori]

Shiori was clinging to the guy, not wanting to let go. Even if he didn't mean a word that he was saying, Shiori was just relieved to have this hug. He wasn't sure when the last time he'd been hugged was. It felt like it'd been forever, but he just didn't know. And Shiori was crying onto this guy's clothes, getting them all wet, and he felt awful about that, but he couldn't move away. He wasn't sure if he'd ever manage to find the will to move away.

This guy... Shiori wanted him to be genuinely kind, just as he seemed to be. Just as he said he was. He seemed to know words to say. It still didn't really make sense as to why. He'd explained, but... If Shiori had seen someone else crying... He was pretty sure he'd try and avoid it. It was awful, but it was true. Even if he tried, he didn't think he would be much of a help. Maybe, maybe he might've a while ago. But Shiori didn't want to be a hero, not anymore. Being a hero was too difficult.

He wasn't a hero, and he wasn't a farmer. He was Ikeda Shiori, and he still had no idea what he was other than that.

"...you're lucky to have a brother like that." He mumbled. It reminded him on his mom. Everyone seemed to be against him, but she'd always been there for him. Except when she hadn't been. But she couldn't have been there for him then. If she could've, she would've. She would've done anything for him. Shiori sniffled.

"Really, really lucky." The child repeated quietly. If only his brothers had been like that.

Shiori finally took a step back, looking down at the ground. "...sorry for..." Shiori fell silent, shifting from foot to foot. He didn't know what to say. "I-" He started, then stopped again. Shiori bit his own lip. "...thank you...?" It was cautious. Wary. He shifted again. Shiori looked up from the floor, looking up at the guy. Shiori felt smaller than ever. "thank you." He repeated, trying for a bit more confidence, but it still came out very quietly. He meant it, though. He hoped this guy knew it.

It was tempting to spill his guts, and he almost did. It was tempting to say every little thing that came to mind, just because he felt like this guy would actually listen. He didn't, though. Not at that moment. He just couldn't find any words.

His eyes fell back onto the ground, and he shifted uncertainly.

 

[Uchiha Keiko]

The boy cried into Satoru a little, making his clothes slightly damp with the tears but Satoru didn't mind too much.
When the boy was done, he apologized and said sorry but he also said that Satoru was lucky to have a brother like that. And that got him thinking. "Does this kid just want someone like an older brother? Is that what he needs or is it something else... I mean, if he really needs somewhere to stay... I suppose I could take him back but I'm not sure how my brother would feel about that."

After thinking about it for a few more seconds, he decided to ask the boy something.
"Where do you live? Do you have a home that's safe you can return to? Do you have anyone to look after you at all or are you all alone? If you genuinely don't have anywhere to stay, I suppose I can take you back with me... My brother probably won't mind very much. He's... a very nice person when it comes to people I know, so there shouldn't be any trouble..." he looked around awkwardly.
This would cause him big trouble if his big brother did go against it.

However...

Satoru remained confident in the fact that his brother probably wouldn't be angry. Why would he? It's not like he was taking a murderer into the house. It was just some kid who needed love and attention. A kid that probably didn't have anyone else to look after him. Kumori would definitely understand.

"But, my only worry is... what about the... hm..." he got lost in his thoughts for a few seconds.
"Isn't there an adoption process required to let someone live in our household? I don't remember. I think that's what brother said but I can't recall correctly. Perhaps. I'd need to ask him but maybe I should tell the kid just in case, because if it does and he doesn't want to be adopted into our family name, this could get awkward."

He eyed up the boy a little more then sighed before continuing.
"I think there's a small process involved with living at our household, if you choose to come. However, it's quite a... BIG process. It's the adoption until our family. The bearing of our last name and our clan pride. It's a lot to take on and it's a lot to give someone I've just practically met but I'm sure you could get far if me and my brother help you... but I'm pretty sure that's the only way..."

Satoru groaned at the fact this couldn't be done so much easier but maybe he should just chill and wait until the kid decides which path he wants to take because if he gave him all the facts now, he might drive the kid away regardless of what the kid wants to do and that would be rather annoying.

 

[Ikeda Shiori]

At first, Shiori was confused. He didn't really understand why this guy wanted to know where he lived. Shiori was staying somewhere, sort of, but he didn't really count that as his home. It wasn't that great of a place really, but it was a place to live. Back with this family was his home. In any case, wasn't it a bad idea to tell strangers where you lived? Shiori was pretty sure that was good general advice. If the questions had stopped there, he might've answered, he might've not. Shiori felt tentative trust towards this guy. It might've been enough for Shiori to let his guard down that much.

Except it didn't stop there. Shiori gaped at him as he went on. This guy didn't know him and he was offering to let Shiori stay in his home?! That didn't make a lick of sense! Shiori could only stare, baffled into silence. Then the confusion turned into wariness. Maybe someone didn't need to have ulterior motives for comforting someone, but this kind of thing just didn't happen. Maybe in a couple of stories, some kid was found by nice people and taken in and everyone lived happily ever after, but things didn't work like that!

There was a chance that maybe things did work like that here, though. And Shiori was really tempted to believe that, to go along with this guy despite any wariness. It would be like a dream come true, if this opportunity was real. If. ...Shiori wanted to believe. He really did.

And then the guy continued, and Shiori felt overwhelmed. What?!

Adoption?!

Shiori had thought... that, it was like an offer to stay around or something. He couldn't even remember this guy's name, and the clan he belonged to!

And Shiori... He was Ikeda Shiori! An Ikeda! They were a bunch of farmers, yeah, but giving up being an Ikeda... It couldn't be right! It was like, forsaking his heritage or something. His name was all he had now.

Wariness was back in full force. This guy, he had to have ulterior motives. He had too. No matter how much Shiori wished otherwise.

Shiori took one small step backwards away from him. Then another, this step a bit larger. After that, he turned and ran, as quick as he could which wasn't all that quick. The book he'd been reading remained open on the table, forgotten.

-Attempted Exit, but easily stoppable-

 

[Uchiha Keiko]

Satoru sighed, as the attempt he had made at being nice was mistaken for something else evidently. He wasn't sure how to approach this but he didn't want to seem too weird. Instead, he would simply attempt to gently grab at the kid's arm and then finish up what he was saying. "You mistake me. I'm not trying to hurt you, I'm not trying to reap any benefits, I'm not trying to gain anything. For once, I'm just trying to help you because you're in a situation I was once in. I'm not doing this because I feel sorry for you, I'm doing this because it hurts to see someone suffer alone like I once did. You don't have to take the offer, it is a rather strange one, I am aware. But, understand I'm not trying to do anything that'd hurt you, only help you. Trust me or don't, that's your choice, But, this is the only time I can offer this and I know it's a lot to give up but I promise it's not a ploy. Everything you hear from me is the God's honest truth."

Satoru sighed and let go of the kid's arm before looking up at the ceiling and groaning. "Why does every attempt at being nice have to back fire in my face? It pisses me off. I'm just trying to help people because I know how it feels to be lonely and they take me for a liar. Ugh, why does it always happen." he scoffed at himself and despite what the boy chose to do, he would look at the book he was reading and inspect it. "Huh..."

He hadn't seen this book before but it seemed interesting. However, he chose not to read it very much because he was focusing on the kid right now but he would remember the name for another time.

 

[Ikeda Shiori]

Shiori froze as soon as he was grabbed, even if it wasn't that harsh of a movement. It was gentle, really. Still, he felt nervous. It was tempting to try and run away still. He could make it, probably. Even if this guy tried to chase after him, surely someone would stop him. Shiori would be safe to go back. Back to... nothing of significance. Back to being alone.

As the guy spoke, Shiori cautiously turned back towards him. Again, he sounded so genuine. Shiori bit his own lip and shifted from foot to foot. But, the guy could still be lying. Lies didn't usually sound that different from the truth. Sometimes they even sounded better, more convincing. Lies worked best when it was something the other person wanted to hear. And this, well. It was something that Shiori really wanted to hear.

The guy let go, however Shiori didn't go off running immediately. It didn't look like the guy was intending to chase after him if he did, instead looking at that book. Shiori could get away easily, he just wasn't sure if he wanted to.

He wasn't sure if he wanted to stay either, though. If Shiori took this offer, he wouldn't be Ikeda Shiori anymore. He'd be... some other Shiori. Whatever-this-guy's-last-name-was Shiori. It still felt wrong, forsaking that name. His dad had sold him, and his brothers had been mean, but all of them were still part of his family. And his mom. It was a piece of his mom, too. He couldn't just get rid of it.

Shiori was quiet for a long moment, eyes focused on the floor once more.

He wanted to have people that cared again. This guy said that he would.

This guy had also said that this was the only time he could offer this. If Shiori didn't accept now, was this chance gone? It was such a big thing and the pressure of making a decision like this weighing down on him. He couldn't just chose right now, could he?!

"I- I- I..." Shiori stuttered weakly, searching for words.

He just didn't know what to do.

And... This guy had a brother, and he seemed like he was a nice brother to this guy, but would he really want Shiori around? Shiori as... family?

Did Shiori even want family again?

He really, really wanted to burst into tears again. This was too much. Way, way too much.

"I-" Again he tried to start speaking, and again he failed.

"...I don't know... I just don't know..." Shiori was nearing hysterics when he finally got the words out.

 

[Uchiha Keiko]

Satoru would look down at the terrified looking kid and he would smile gently and put a hand on each of his arms to relax him.
"You mistake me. I simply said I cannot offer it again. If you refuse, I can't. But, if you want time to think about it, I can give you that time. I know it must be a tough thought. You'd be abandoning the name you have, you'd be leaving the name you were born to protect, go. I know how hard... Actually, I don't know but I can imagine it's not easy." Satoru looked up and smiled a bit more. "Just remember that if you say yes to my offer, we will offer you a warm home, a loving family and a place to learn. You do have a choice, feel free to say no. I don't want you to feel as if I'm forcing you because I'm not. It's a choice. Yes or no. You have the power to answer it how you will. If you don't say no now, I can give you time to think about it and should you say no later, then that's okay too. But take your time and when you have an answer, give it to me. " he smiled one last time, letting go of the kid.